The Truth Behind The Narcissist’s Mask…
Yes! It is possible, usual, and normal, for a Narcissist to take all of the steps necessary, to assume a believable, powerful persona, of someone that they are not! They are expert, pathological liars, that will say and do anything, to cover up the truth of what they really are. Sometimes they come from damaged family backgrounds. Sometimes, they are spoiled, rotten brats. Sometimes, there is no reason for them to act the way that they do. The “sense of entitlement” of a Narcissist drives them to do whatever they want, to whomever they want, to achieve a sense of superiority, and acceptance, in their conception of reality.
For this reason, here is my most important advice to you! Do a background check on this person before you get too involved, especially when you’re talking about the The Three M’S; MONEY, MOVING IN TOGETHER, & MARRIAGE! If you’re talking about your future, you have the right to know about their past, and present life. Ask for, or obtain his/her SS#, and Drivers’ license # (better yet, a copy of the ID). See if they have aliases, criminal history,ex-wives, current wives, children, and mental problems. Run a credit report on them. Go to the County Records, and pull up everything you can find with their name on it (you can do some of this online). And, even after that , DIG DEEPER! I didn’t find out, until we were separated after seven years of living together, that my ex husband had been involved in 62 lawsuits (YES, SIXTY TWO), that I was not even aware of, BEFORE WE WERE MARRIED!!! He was a professional litigator, without an attorney’s license! Hope this helps you feel a little bit better. I, at least, deserve a free dunce cap.
Yes ladies, make sure you do your homework, because the signs are there, and infatuation is blind. I believed in my ex narc and his pathological lies, because he is an expert at manipulation and mind games. I met him in Dec. 95. He was in such a hurry for me to quit a very good job, leave my family, and marry him which I did marry him in Feb.96. This narc was charming smooth talking had an answer for everything. I didn’t find out til a week after we were married and I moved with him that he had been married three times, and had two minor children. Yes when we met I asked have you ever been married, his response “I divorced in 94.” Yes I asked do you have children. His response “no” which meant not from his 3rd marriage. He could manipulate questions and answers that was mind blowing .Same week into the marriage I should have gotten out, but his mind games and manipulation kept me under his subjection. It started with the verbal abuse, correcting me on every possible issue, I couldn’t tie my shoes without him complaining that I wasn’t tying my shoes the right way. Talk about a man from hell, this guy created hell.. We both had good jobs, and he managed to have money spent before Payday. 11 years I put up with his abuse, which led to two bankruptcies, one repossession, and a foreclosure of a $300,000.00 home. My credit is shot, because of his materialistic greed. He didn’t have good credit so everything was in my name. 11 years of marriage ended suddenly and abruptly with his reasoning being that he did not love me anymore, because he loved someone else. Which that relationship happened suddenly too as well as with their marriage. My ex narc and his new wife lied and caused me to get arrested, and lose my job making 51,000.00 a year. 11 years of employment went down the drain with the marriage. He divorced me in June of 2007, I got fired from my job in July 2OO7. He remarried to wife #5 in August 2007. I am still trying to recover from this devastation. I had no idea anyone could be so crafty and evil towards another human being. SO WITHOUT A DOUBT LADIES PLEASE DO YOUR HOMEWORK!!!!!
Before you COMMIT, SOLICIT; The man you may commit your life to may be a truly disturbed invidual, narcissists are very dangerous people, they are so skilled at masking their disease, that you may not find out about it until years of damage, and major financial crisis, not to mention a piece of your sanity. So gather up as much information about this person as possible, please for your own life sake!
Noticed you haven’t posted for a while. Hope you are okay.
I like reading your blog, its very good,
Best Wishes
Liberty
Thank you! I’m working on it now.