Hi Everyone… well, if you stopped by recently as within the past several weeks, you saw what was an collection a garbage that was not posted by me and my partner. I am sorry for the problem. Perhaps it was the extended reach of my ex NARC again!
Anyway, look for several new updates! It is getting good, and bad, and you will not believe it!
Yes! It is possible, usual, and normal, for a Narcissist to take all of the steps necessary, to assume a believable, powerful persona, of someone that they are not! They are expert, pathological liars, that will say and do anything, to cover up the truth of what they really are. Sometimes they come from damaged family backgrounds. Sometimes, they are spoiled, rotten brats. Sometimes, there is no reason for them to act the way that they do. The “sense of entitlement” of a Narcissist drives them to do whatever they want, to whomever they want, to achieve a sense of superiority, and acceptance, in their conception of reality.
For this reason, here is my most important advice to you! Do a background check on this person before you get too involved, especially when you’re talking about the The Three M’S; MONEY, MOVING IN TOGETHER, & MARRIAGE! If you’re talking about your future, you have the right to know about their past, and present life. Ask for, or obtain his/her SS#, and Drivers’ license # (better yet, a copy of the ID). See if they have aliases, criminal history,ex-wives, current wives, children, and mental problems. Run a credit report on them. Go to the County Records, and pull up everything you can find with their name on it (you can do some of this online). And, even after that , DIG DEEPER! I didn’t find out, until we were separated after seven years of living together, that my ex husband had been involved in 62 lawsuits (YES, SIXTY TWO), that I was not even aware of, BEFORE WE WERE MARRIED!!! He was a professional litigator, without an attorney’s license! Hope this helps you feel a little bit better. I, at least, deserve a free dunce cap.
I’m glad that so many of you have found, and followed my blog. You must all give yourselves a HUGE round of applause, and many pats on your backs, for surviving the abuse that you, and your children, did not deserve. Please write in, and tell me more about your experiences with your NARC, and how you made it through the battles. You have no idea how many people that you would be helping. I had no idea how many people have been in my same situation,and been destroyed by their involvement with a Narcissist,until I received a ton of responses to my blog. It makes me wonder how many people were not able to survive the devastation, caused by this relationship, and turned to alcohol, drugs, and suicide.
I ended up homeless during this ordeal, and I’m sure many others have had to go there too. It’s so painful to talk about, that you just CAN NOT talk about it. We can not believe that we will get any help from the police, the Court system, and even our family and friends, because the NARCS are AMAZING PATHOLOGICAL LIARS, and are able to twist every truth, into a lie that is beneficial for them. Those on the outside of your relationship, do not get this, and will not believe you. It’s hard for us to wrap our minds around such a ridiculous reality.
We really need to FIND and CREATE more support groups to help us cope with, and find the better life, THAT WE DESERVE. I know that there are some wonderful groups of counselors out there already, and I would love to be able to help spread the word, of help that may be available to all of us. Thank you, and much love to all of you.
This is a very important message that I need to share with all of you. Right now,I am exhausted. I don’t want to get out of bed. I don’t give a shit about what happens today, or tomorrow. I’m sick of the abuse by my ex, the Courts, attorneys, and blah, blah, blah. I began writing this blog in 2009, never, ever thinking that I would still be writing this in 2011!! TEN YEARS of my life! Oh well, I need to get over this crap.
I haven’t been able to add a lot of humor in my entries, due to the fact that THERE IS NOTHING FUNNY,when you are living with the Devil ( well…maybe sometimes).
Now for the good news! This is a temporary moment in your life. Five days ago, I saw the proverbial “light at the end of the tunnel”, and knew that I could, and would, be the wonderful,loving ,giving, beautiful, successful person that I was, before I became involved with this sick, destructive, inhumane, creature.
Embrace the fact that you truly know the meaning of LOVE ; the Narc will never be able to experience that feeling, and it PISSES THEM OFF! They get off on seeing the pain that they inflict on others. Realize how sick, and miserable the NARC will always be. NOTHING will ever satisfy them. They don’t/won’t recognize that they have NPD ( a combination of many psychosis; pathological liars, self delusion. self entitlement, and on and on crap) . This disorder can NEVER be fixed. Do not blame yourself ; just get the fuck out of there, before you lose your sanity, kids, money, self worth, and everything else that you still possess.
Anyway, tomorrow is a new day. I’ll get over these recent days of frustration, and life will be great again. I hope this helps some of you. PLEASE, PLEASE, continue to share your words, thoughts, wisdom, questions, and answers ,with me.
My ex warned me he would “…Take me down!” In a fit of rage, violent and threatening, as usual, he laid into me with a verbal assault. His tirade left no visible mark on the outside, and nobody believes me when I tell them what happened. Well, almost nobody. The Narc always plans what they do to you, for their own best outcome. It’s what you get when you meet a narcissistic abuser… the outside is all the matters.
It has been several months now since my divorce is supposedly final, but Narc is trying to appeal the judges decision. Not that this judge did me any favors, mind you. In fact, it has come to light that he and my ex had “business” together that explains a lot. So as I sit here, trying to make sense of the unreasonable which is for the most part a gigantic waste of life, I remember Narc’s words, actions and threats as vividly as if it were yesterday. And I am tired, beyond belief. It is everything I can do just to survive each day, as the residue of this horror continues to grip me and drag me down, without a moments rest.
He won. And I cannot imagine an outcome whereby he would not have won, at least on the surface, because that is what someone with narcissistic personality disorder does – win at all cost, even to their children, family and friends. No one is safe from the abuse of the Narcissist.
No One. My Marriage was a joke, my divorce an even larger joke, and still there is work to be done, court issues to be handled and now a new lawsuit designed to finish what Narc started. Just a few minutes rest, perhaps a brief day in the sun, and then I might pick myself up out of the dust and take a step up out of this pit that has become my life….