Feb 182011
 

The Truth Behind The Narcissist’s Mask…

Yes! It is possible, usual, and normal, for a Narcissist to take all of the steps necessary, to assume a believable, powerful persona, of someone that they are not! They are expert, pathological liars, that will say and do anything, to cover up the truth of what they really are. Sometimes they come from damaged family backgrounds. Sometimes, they are spoiled, rotten brats. Sometimes, there is no reason for them to act the way that they do. The “sense of entitlement” of a Narcissist drives them to do whatever they want, to whomever they want, to achieve a sense of superiority, and acceptance, in their conception of reality.

For this reason, here is my most important advice to you! Do a background check on this person before you get too involved, especially when you’re talking about the The Three M’S; MONEY, MOVING IN TOGETHER, & MARRIAGE! If you’re talking about your future, you  have the right to know about their past, and present life.  Ask for, or obtain his/her SS#, and Drivers’ license # (better yet, a copy of the ID).  See if they have aliases, criminal history,ex-wives, current wives, children, and mental problems. Run a credit report on them. Go to the County Records, and pull up everything you can find with their name on it (you can do some of this online). And, even after that , DIG DEEPER! I didn’t find out, until we were separated after seven years of living together, that  my ex husband had been involved in 62 lawsuits (YES, SIXTY TWO), that I was not even aware of, BEFORE WE WERE MARRIED!!! He was a professional litigator, without an attorney’s license! Hope this helps you feel a little bit better. I, at least, deserve a free dunce cap.

May 012010
 

Narcissistic Ex leaves a residue that taints long after they leave…

Come in contact with a narcissist and you cannot help but feel violated – even with brief contact.  But live with and marry one, and likely you will be tainted by their caustic residue long after they have scattered the remains of your relationship all around you as you lay on the floor struggling to regain your foothold.

This is the insidious result of the narc’s ability to suck the life blood out of those they profess to love and care for, all the while draining you of every drop of energy and joy you posses. And those who are unfortunate enough to last a few rounds with a narc end up loosing everything in the end. Even their future. Those who live it, feel it and survive this battle one on one with the narc are forever scarred…. damaged goods long after they are left in that black smoke of the void that once contained the narc and his entourage.

Perhaps there is an opportunity in all this for the creation of a new support group – Narcissist Survivors Anonymous (NSA)! Anyone want in on the formation of the first chapter? We can hold the meetings in rooms with no mirrors, padded walls to reduce the echo and everyone will have to talk about someone else as opposed to themselves… otherwise even our best efforts to keep the poison of a narc out of the group meetings would be destroyed. And you know that once a narc finds out about our efforts, they will crash it and take over, making the entire process about them. Next thing you know… mirrors everywhere!

Narcissists and those with Narcissistic Personality Disorder be warned… we see the rubble in the wake of your destructive path, and wish to protect the next in line who come in contact with the left-over pieces of the survivors! Not an easy task….