Abuse from The Narcissisist and the Narcissistic Ex

My husband abused me for over nine years; six years during our marriage, and three more years since our separation and divorce. Our “Family Law” case is STILL not settled.

The abuse didn’t start until after we got married. We lived together for a year prior to marrying in a fairly blissful relationship. We did have problems with hostile interference from his ex wife (SECOND ex wife) and, and her continual use of their two children as pawns to try to destroy our relationship. They had been divorced for a year before we started dating. He swore to me that the problems that he had with her were temporary; just a matter of straightening out a few child custody issues that would not be a problem for us. According to him, his ex was a drug addict, alcoholic, and an adulteress, that had abandoned him and their two children from the beginning of their marriage. He was the victim,and SHE was the villain.

Before the marriage he convinced me that he was the most loving, protective, adoring man, that I had ever met, and that I was the most special woman in the world. He loved me. His children loved me. He would take care of me.WE were meant to be! I never, never, thought that he had intentions to, or was capable of, hurting me like he did.

After looking back on our relationship, I now see that he carefully planned the entire drama, from the beginning to the end, and this was not his first rodeo. I was his third wife; he orchestrated and conducted his first two marriages in the same manner. I found this out by going through court records and transcripts that revealed the tactics that he used to try to destroy his first two wives, and they were the exact same tactics that he used to try to destroy me.

Sound like someone you know? More later.

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Before the beginning with my Narcissistic Ex

No matter how hard I try as I sit here looking back on this experience, there are not enough clues in life for one to really see where things are heading and how they would end.

Nothing, and no one, could prepare me for living with, marrying, and surviving the sick relationship that I had with my ex husband. There are so many of us out there that have been through, or are going through, something that we never thought could happen to us. I want to share my experiences with you, and hopefully be able to help or learn from others that have been involved with a “Narcissist”.

There is no concrete definition that I know of, to peg a Narcissistic personality. From my experience,it is a combination of a pathological liar, sociopath, psychopath, masochist, and probably a few other things thrown in there. I’m not a psychiatrist, or a psychologist, but I have talked to professionals to try to figure out what the hell I was involved with. What I do know is that it is a personality disorder,that is pretty much incurable, because the person believes that they are a God, in their own mind. Hitler( yes the man responsible for the Holocaust) is a perfect although extreme example. They can fool many into believing in a blown up FALSE image of themselves and will manipulate ANYONE and EVERYONE ( including their own children) that they can, by lying, cheating, stealing, and whatever else it takes, with absolutely NO remorse!

Enough for now. PLEASE send me your thoughts and experiences.

L.D.

This blog is an exploration into the issues of marrying and divorcing a Narcissist! There is so much to know and so much to share with you, and please post your responses and share with me and the rest of the world your experiences with the Narcissist in your life.

A harrowing journey; I decided to start this blog after so many of my family and friends said it would be cathartic and informative and perhaps what is happening to me and what I am doing about it may be of use and guidance for others in my same shoes. I’m still searching for answers to questions such as, how the hell did I let myself get there? Thank you God, friends, and family, for helping me get out! It’s all uphill from here.

I look forward to our journey together, and please come back often.

Always,

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