About Me
I was married for six years. My divorce has STILL not been settled after three years from our date of separation. That equals NINE years of hell that I’ve survived, but it’s still not over. I’ve asked myself at least a thousand times, how can this be?
I finally found an answer after many, years of counseling and research. My ex is a Narcissist.
It has been an interesting challenge to handle all of the issues both obvious and at time not so obvious, but I am better off now than I was at the beginning of this adventure. My goal in all this is to share with you my story, and to give those of you out there who know what I am talking about a forum to share, learn, laugh and perhaps even cry about our struggles and the lessons we have learned along the way.
Join me. Or just sit back and read my story as it develops.
As always,
LD
I left lengthy message, I was married for almost 20 yrs. Modeled, bore 3 beautiful babies, Loyal to a fault. Slowly took my pride, money, dignity. I have nothing. He and new girlfriend live in house we bought with my dad estate. My brother will never step up and defend, He will look rediculous. I get MY CO-DEPENDENCE, allowed me to lose my life, happiness future. My lawyer thru me under the bus. Not much hope, they know they are getting away with slowly, methodically taking away my hope. I try to believe, for my kids. My lawyer sits, his lawyer attacks. No reason to keep trying. I lost EVERYTHING. They have control. I would help others, but the flea bag hotel is done on Sunday. I just wanted for someone to believe me, see the truth. I never believed I was worth, someone is listen.. Hop this may stop another’s pain.. Thanks.
I was married to a narc for 19 years and had 3 beautiful children with him. I didn’t even know what hit me or that he was narcissistic until a couple of years after the divorce. I too was thrown under the bus by my lawyer – my ex had found some dirt on him and was using it against him. My ex never took the kids and is now saying it was because he was scared of me! So now, after raising my kids all alone without help from him, he is reaching and pulling the kids into his nightmare. But it is hurting me. My kids, it was the eldest one first, are slowly treating me the way he did and believing all his lies. It has been 11 years since the divorce and I was doing really well, until he reached in with his emotional manipulation tactics with my kids. Unfortunately, my younges daughter is now trying to get a divorce from a narcissist and I thnk he is worse that her father. I just want to wake up from this hideous nightmare and get my life back.
Yes, sounds pretty much the same as what i’m going through.
I was married to a narc for 19 years and had 3 beautiful children with him. I didn’t even know what hit me or that he was narcissistic until a couple of years after the divorce. I too was thrown under the bus by my lawyer – my ex had found some dirt on him and was using it against him. My ex never took the kids and is now saying it was because he was scared of me! So now, after raising my kids all alone without help from him, he is reaching and pulling the kids into his nightmare. But it is hurting me. My kids, it was the eldest one first, are slowly treating me the way he did and believing all his lies. It has been 11 years since the divorce and I was doing really well, until he reached in with his emotional manipulation tactics with my kids. Unfortunately, my younges daughter is now trying to get a divorce from a narcissist and I thnk he is worse that her father. I just want to wake up from this hideous nightmare and get my life back.
+1
I stayed married to a narcissist for almost 11 years until she made the mistake of attacking other family members. It was at that point I realized what I was dealing with, The problems I had are small when compared to the stories I have read on this site.Although I felt as if my heart had shattered into 1000′s little parts, I knew it was the only way to find happiness, I divorced her and refused any further contact. Keep your chin up it will get better. Good luck to each and everyone..I will say a small prayer.
I was with my Narc for 11 long and miserable years. We have a 9 year old son together. When we split, he dumped my 11 year old daughter who was 9 months old when we met. He cheated on me with a girl from his job for almost a year.. before I got fed up and finally booted his butt out. They just had a baby last month and she has 3 of her own kids. He is a liar, a snake and a deceptive prick. He’s not above lying to get what he wants and he is as fake as they come. I find myself wondering if it wasn’t all just me.. then I remember every time he cheated on me and physically abused me and I know its not my fault. My kids are both in therapy to repair the damage that was caused from living with him. I feel sorry for the new supply but am thankful that b/c of her he leaves us alone. I wish I would wake up and this would all be a nightmare. I gave up 11 years of my life for a lie. I never meant anything to him and never will. We were just play toys for him.
I have been going through a divorce with a Narcissist for the last three and a half years; March 2012 will make it 4 years. She is completely unreasonable about everything. She has found an attorney who she does not pay, but continues to take me back to court over every little thing. Then he tells the judge I should pay for his time and the judge here has no problem awarding those fees. They have taken or forced me to liquidate everything I have to pay for her attorney, the guardian ad litem, and my attorney (that is when I can afford them). She and her attorney have lied to the court, presented false data, and because I wasn’t able to afford an attorney at the time, I was not able to present what needed to be presented to show they were and are wrong. It all takes money. At the last hearing as I sat testifying to the court how her attorney has harassed me, threatened me with jail time, she was sitting there with one of those smiles, the one that was saying I am loving seeing you on the hot seat, then she reached up to her eye with one finger and acted like she was wiping away a tear. All I want is for it to be over. We have been married for 22 years, she has had multiple affairs, manipulated me and everyone else, and I just kept telling myself I need to make it until my children are grown and then I can divorce her. I had no idea she would make my life a living hell after separating from her. It isn’t easy, and people have told me I have the patience of JOB. But she has left emtional scars on me that will never go away, she has taken away from me … my pride, dignity, my children, and because of her attorneys harassment towards me at work, and constantly notifying my employer or requesting this document and that document and then with all the time taken off for these stupid ass, frivilous court hearings over nothing, I have lost my job. The bottom line in my oppinion, if you are divorcing a Narc, get in touch with the witness relocation program, and don’t let them know where you are.